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This light headedness

is difficult to explain
it begins with a gradual throb
then a steady beat
of an unstable mind
searching for the right
amount of words to
describe the state of mind
of an ever unsettled soul.
This dizziness is
felt each time the
need to describe the
real state of mind
arises and then goes away
just like a harmattan wind
on a rainy September night
making such eerie sounds
the mind becomes unstable.
This uncleaniness the
heart feels every
morning when awake,
and with a throbbing headache
all the worries of the world
arrive and melt in
as fine butter
constantly asking,
"why does your mind
dwell on such drunkenness?"
This feeling at 2:55am
when almost every being
is trapped in a vision of
as you struggle with
what lays beside you a
disturbing hourly challenge
and you still ask yourself
I'm I to or not to?
Whereas, all the while
you knew the answers to
your numerous questions.
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need balance

there's some beauty in darkness:
something interesting about
the way the air would heavily light
an irony of perfect juxtaposition. there's some beauty in ugly:
something intriguing about the
huge grotesque scars that
seem to never want to go away. there's some beauty in evil:
un peu de la purité in
the heart of a condemned man,
an innocence buried beneath a blanket of
bottled up emotions. these little beauties we
choose to neglect
aren't they the very things that
make living bearable? who would be good without the existence
of evil?
who would be beautiful without ugliness?
or what story could ever be told without scars? need beauty and ugliness,
need scars and healing oils,
need good and evil,
need all the balance to remain
steady and sane in this
crazy crazy world. need balance:
then imbalance to
balance the human equation
now and again.